Teaching Sango
by This-Rin
Summary: Sango loses her memories in a fight, how will the group deal when a certain perverted monk has to teach her? Eventual Romance, rated for Langauge and Miroku-ness
1. Memory Loss

**Chapter One: Memory Loss**

Business around the campfire was as it usually was, Kagome seemed to be wondering and testing out how many times she could say sit after being upset by a certain hanyou. Inuyasha was, well, a crater of swearing and smoke. Shippou was sitting victoriously upon Kagome's shoulder and looking down upon the hole that was now Inuyasha. Sango and Miroku watched from the other side of the fire, not wanting to disturb Kagome's rant.

"You're such an inconsiderate idiot!" Kagome yelled, grabbing her bike "Sango-chan, Miroku-sama, I'm going _home_. Sorry Shippou-chan, I'll be back in a few days"

"Wait! Kagome, you-" Inuyasha said, clawing his way out of the hole

"SIT!" Kagome yelled from her bicycle, she rode off into the distance.

Inuyasha almost had time to sigh before his face came in contact with the muddy earth.

"You do deserve it sometimes, you know" Miroku mused to Inuyasha, who emerged, swearing and rubbing his head.

"Oh yeah, how?" he asked gruffly.

"Going off with Kikyou all the time" supplied Shippou, jumping onto Sango's shoulder.

Miroku crossed his arms and nodded.

Inuyasha huffed, as he usually did when the subject of Kikyou was brought up. Sango sighed and looked over in the direction Kagome had gone.

"Poor Kagome-chan" she thought out loud

"Poor her? Poor me!" Inuyasha yelled "And I doubt she even left me any Ramen..."

Kirara jumped up from her sleep and hissed, her fur standing up on end.

"What's wrong, Kirara?" Sango asked, getting up.

A woman and a small white haired girl emerged from the bushes. Kagura and Kanna, Kagura swung her fan and send wind blades at the group, who responded in a flurry of movement.

Sango picked up her giant boomerang Hirikotsu, Inuyasha drew Tessiaga, Miroku's grip tightened on his right hand and Shippou just stood there trying not to get hit.

Sango and Inuyasha lunged forwards, each swinging their weapon. Inuyasha went for Kagura and Sango for Kanna.

Minutes passed and the fight became more heated, with Miroku failing to suck Kagura into the air void in his right hand due to the sudden appearance of Naraku's poison bees. Sango swung her boomerang again, attempting to break Kanna's barrier, to her surprise it broke. She lunged forward, sword at the ready when all of a sudden Kanna's mirror started to glow.

Moments later, Miroku noticed Sango lying on the ground as Inuyasha warded off Kagura and Kanna.

"Sango, are you all right?" Miroku asked, helping her to her feet. Sango had a blank look on.

"San-go" she repeated, dumbly. "San-go"

"Sango, what's the matter?"

"San-go, I _have_ heard that before. Sir, could you tell me who _Sango _is?" she asked, staring at Miroku. Miroku's eyes widened slightly and he turned to Inuyasha with a worried look on his face.

"Inuyasha! We have a problem!" he shouted.

Inuyasha came running over, with his sword over his shoulder "What now?"

Sango pointed at him victoriously "I KNOW WHO YOU ARE!" she exclaimed, she thought for a while and then let her hand drop lamely "No, I don't"

Inuyasha's jaw dropped "Oh, Kagome's gonna be _pissed_ when she gets back"

"Kagome is going to be pissed when she gets back!" Sango repeated proudly

"It's nothing to be happy about, I'm probably going to get 'sat' by Kagome" Inuyasha said unhappily, "Oh how could this HAPPEN?"

"Kagome is going to sit on you!" Sango clarified in the same proud tone.

Shippou came running up to them and jumped up onto Sango's head. "What's-" Sango ran around in a circle, screaming "It's in my hair! It's in my hair!"

"Calm down!" Miroku said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't touch me! It's in my hair! Who are you all?" she said, stepping away from them with an alarmed look on her face.

---

Miroku, Inuyasha and Shippou managed to convince Sango to come to Kaede's hut with them. She still had no clue who she was, but kept repeating "It's in my hair" or "Kagome is going to sit on you" in a dreamy voice.

"It does not look good" Kaede said, after examining Sango "She has lost almost all memory, if she'd lost any more she'd have no clue how to even talk"

"That bad?" Shippou said

Kaede nodded "Where is Miss Kagome?" she asked Inuyasha

"The wench went home" Inuyasha snorted

"The wench went home. Miss Kagome is the wench. Kagome is going to sit on you" Sango said dreamily.

"It's not a good thing!" Inuyasha snapped at her.

Sango was gazing out of the window and didn't even seem to notice Inuyasha glaring at her. He suddenly stood up "I have to go get Kagome, tell her what happened...before she finds out herself"

"I'm coming!" Shippou said, jumping up onto his shoulder.

"You can't even use the well!" Inuyasha snapped

"But I miss her!" Shippou replied angrily

"Grrr...FINE!"

Inuyasha stalked out of the hut with Shippou clinging to his back. Kaede eyed Miroku warningly "I have to go now," Miroku perked up "_BUT, _Miss Sango, if this man touches you_, here _or _here_" she indicated the necessary places "Then hit him"

"Here as well?" Sango questioned, grabbing her own chest "Because he did that on the way here"

Miroku smiled innocently and Kaede gave him a withering look. "It was simply a test!" he said, "To see if she'd react..."

"Yes, there as well. He is not to touch, Miss Sango" Kaede confirmed walking out of the hut.

Sango pointed at Miroku, with the air of telling off a little child "You" she said dangerously "Are not to touch Miss Sango _here, here_" she demonstrated "Not even here"

Miroku sighed in disappointment.

"You" she said again, pointing at him then to herself "Is my name Miss Sango?"

Miroku inhaled, not believing his luck and shook his head, grinning ear to ear.

---

Inuyasha propped Shippou on the edge of the well.

"Wait _here_" he said, flexing his muscles and pulling a strained face

"What are you _doing_?" Shippou asked as Inuyasha stretched his arm muscles.

"I am getting ready to be 'sat', fool" Inuyasha snapped. He jumped down the well and crossed into Kagome's time.

He jumped out of the well in the Higurashi well house and ran out, jumping through Kagome's window.

"Kagome! Kagome! You here?"

The door opened, there stood Kagome in a towel. Inuyasha did the only thing he could; he hid under the bed.

"That idiot, Inuyasha. Sneaking off with that Kikyou all the time!" Kagome was saying to herself. "I can't believe him! And he told me he cared about me"

Inuyasha pulled a face; this was not what he wanted to be hearing, not that he wanted to be hearing _anything_.

The towel dropped to the floor and Inuyasha sweatdropped. Kagome's feet moved around for a bit as she collected her clothes.

"And it's not like she's even _alive!_ molestation, yuck!"

Inuyasha _really_ wished he'd stayed back in his time. Listening to a naked Kagome talking about corpse molestation was NOT very appealing, not that he wanted to listen to a naked Kagome anyway, he assured himself quickly.

Nope, he was **not** having these thoughts, he decided. He stared at the bottom of Kagome's bed for a while, then it sagged with Kagome's weight. He waited a couple of minutes and (thinking that she'd gone to sleep) emerged from her bed.

She hadn't.

Nor had she troubled herself to get completely dressed.

Kagome was sat there, in her underclothes, doing her hair. She froze. Inuyasha froze

"SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT, SIT!" Kagome yelled "Ooooh, you pervert, how long have you been here? _DON'T YOU_ LIFT YOUR HEAD FROM THAT FLOOR! SIT, SIT, SIT, **_SIT!_**"

"Kagome...misunderstanding...simply...because...didn't want to _see_...accidental..." where the only understandable words. "Just came to tell...anyway, didn't even see...anything"

"You...You...You..." Kagome stuttered, pulling on her clothes "I'm...getting...a...LOCK...for that...window!"

---

"Sango-chan was in an accident?" Kagome said, after calming down and peeling Inuyasha from the floor.

"Kaede-Baba said she's lost all her memories. The only way of getting them back would be to break that brat Kanna's mirror"

"We have to go back!" Kagome exclaimed, standing up.

"Yeah, we can't be too long because I _did _leave her with Miroku..."

"WHAT? YOU LEFT HER TO BE MOLESTED BY MIROKU-SAMA? YOU IDIOT!" Kagome yelled

---

Half an hour later, Kagome ran into Kaede's hut with Inuyasha and Shippou following.

Miroku sat there with an arm round Sango, smiling broadly.

"Look, Sango, it's Kagome. Do you remember her?" Miroku said, as if talking to a two-year-old.

"Kagome wants to sit on you!" Sango said happily, pointing at Inuyasha.

"Miroku" Kagome said dangerously "What have you done to Sango-chan?"

"Nothing!" Miroku said innocently "I've been teaching you, haven't I, Sango?"

"Inuyasha!" Sango said, pointing to Inuyasha happily "Miroku!" she said, pointing to Miroku.

"Well, it doesn't look like he's done that bad a job" Kagome sighed, "And I thought..."

"_I_" Sango announced proudly "Am Miroku's woman!"

Miroku sweatdropped "I told you not to repeat that..." he muttered under his breath.

* * *

**That is my attempt. I hope you like it. Please review.**


	2. Sango The Five Year Old Duckling

**This took forever, what with me writing my other ones...man, I'm so devoted. Sorry for the lateness.**

**Chapter Two: Sango the five-year-old duckling**

Kagome took Sango off to the side while Inuyasha and Shippou interrogated Miroku.

"Can you tell me who you are?" Kagome asked kindly with a smile on her face.

Sango took a deep breath in "My name is Sango, I am Miroku's woman. I enjoy getting touched on the butt and getting watched in the hot springs and I never _ever_ slap people"

Kagome's smile disappeared and she turned slowly to Miroku.

"What have you done, Miroku-sama?" She said, with a look of menace.

Miroku opened his mouth and closed it again. Sango pulled at Kagome's hair hard.

"Hair" she said firmly, demanding attention.

"Yes, very nice Sango" Kagome said soothingly, then turned back to Miroku "What are you going to do when she regains her ?" Miroku suggested meekly.

Kagome felt a tug and her skirt fell down. Sango was staring at Kagome's skirt.

"Not hair" Sango said in a disappointed voice

"I didn't teach her to do _that_!" Miroku said in defence

Kagome ducked at pulled up her skirt, her face beet red "Sango, no!"

"Not hair" Sango said, she poked Kagome's skirt as Kagome pulled it up

"It's like she's turned into some kind of...five-year-old!" Kagome said, her face still crimson.

"Sango was like _this_ when she was five years old?" Inuyasha spluttered, laughing

Kaede entered the hut, looking grave. "What did he do to her, then?" she asked.

Miroku sighed "Does _no one _trust me?"

"No" they replied as one (except for Sango, who just stared).

"My name is Sango, I am Miroku's woman. I enjoy getting touched on the butt and getting watched in the hot springs and I never _ever_ slap people!" Sango exclaimed to Kaede, who shot a poisonous look at Miroku.

"We have to go after Kanna, to break that mirror!" Kagome said importantly.

Sango suddenly hugged Inuyasha "Hug" she said blankly, with a vacant expression.

"Ok, I taught her _that_." Miroku admitted.

"Sango, you can't just hug anyone, and I think you're scaring Inuyasha" Kagome said calmly.

Sango didn't let go of Inuyasha.   
"Arrgh, let me _go _you weird woman!" Inuyasha said, struggling against her grip.

"Seems like she's not listening" Kaede said, she turned to Miroku "Am I right to think you were the first person who talked to her after the accident?"

Miroku nodded and Kaede made a hmm noise.

"That means that Sango will only learn from him" Kaede said, much to Miroku's happiness "Seeing as he was the first person to talk to her"

"How does that work?" demanded Inuyasha, prying Sango off of his arm.

"Think of it like ducklings, they will follow and learn only from the first person they see after they are born" Kaede said patiently.

Miroku beamed "So, she's going to follow what I tell her?"

"I'm not sure, because when I told her you were not to touch her, she obeyed" Kaede mused.

"Um, no, she didn't" Miroku said, rubbing the back of his head "I think she was just copying you"

"Miroku-sama you _didn't_!" Kagome said scathingly helping Inuyasha pull a blank-looking Sango off of his arm.

Sango looked sad when they managed to pull her off of Inuyasha and then just stood there looking as vacant as ever.

Slowly, Sango raised a hand, pointing at Inuyasha "Kagome wants to sit on you"

"No, I don't!" Kagome objected, blushing.

"Kagome wants to sit on you!" Sango repeated, somewhat angrily, still pointing at Inuyasha.

"Sango- I- don't want..."

"Just agree with her," Miroku said in a tired voice.

"Ok, Ok, I want to sit on – Oh Inuyasha, I'm sorry!" Inuyasha's face was now rather intimate with the wooden floor. To Sango, it was extremely funny.

"Sango...not funny...you..." Inuyasha grunted from the floor.

"Actually, it is quite funny." Kagome chuckled.

---

An hour later and Inuyasha and Kagome had sneaked off somewhere to argue, because Sango kept pulling Kagome's skirt down. Sango walked up to Miroku.

"Miroku" she said.

"Yes, Sango?"

"Bored" She said.

"Well, Sango, what shall we do to entertain ourselves?"

"Wazzat?" Sango asked, poking his gloved hand.

"Kazaana" explained Miroku

Sango held out her right hand and examined it briefly

"Kazaana!"

"Um..." Miroku said, sweatdropping.

---

"Stop being so sensitive, Kagome! Its not like...I mean well, Kik-"

"Don't talk to me about Kikyou!" Kagome sobbed "You obviously like her much more than me, even though she's such a bitch!"

"Kagome, its not like that!" snapped Inuyasha.

"Yes, it is!"

Inuyasha pulled Kagome into a hug "I like you a lot, Kagome"

"Hug"

"Huh?" Inuyasha said, "Kagome was that you?"

"That sounded a lot like-" Kagome stuttered, red.

Sango jumped out from the bushes, beaming, with Shippou perched on her head. "Miroku's woman is here!"

Inuyasha and Kagome ripped apart quickly.

"Oh, Hi, guys..." Miroku said, emerging "Just showing Sango, you know...the sights"

Sango pointed at the two "Sight" she said happily "Inuyasha and Kagome are a sight!"

"Yes, Sango!" Miroku said, clapping his hands together.

"The well is a sight, Kagome goes down a well to her home." Sango thought for a while and turned to Miroku "Kagome lives down a well?"

"No, Sango, Kagome's home is on the other side of the well" Miroku clarified.

"No, Sango, Kagome's home is on the other side of the well" Sango repeated, turning back to Kagome and Inuyasha she said happily "Inuyasha and Kagome need to admit their feelings"

Kagome and Inuyasha glared at Miroku, who smiled.

"Shippou is a fox demon. Kaede is an old miko. Inuyasha is a hanyou. Kagome is a miko." Sango said.

"And Miroku is..." Inuyasha said, pulling back his fist threateningly.

"Miroku is a houshi who can do no wrong," Sango said, then she lifted her right hand and pointed to her palm, with an expression of glee "Kazaana".

* * *

angelwings0509 - Thank you!

Inu obbsessed o.0 - I'm glad you like it.

Lindorie- Chan - Yeaaaaah...

kawaii-ish - Thank you!

Nani-Nadja - :)


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